by Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, PhD
Jealousy is a toxic and debilitating emotion--one that causes harm to any relationship when the jealousy rears its ugly head. Jealousy leads to hurt, anger and other destructive behavior that ultimately hurts yourself and the relationships in your life. For example, you won't run over to your neighbor and scream at her for buying a new car, but you might pick a fight with your significant other, because your family budget does not allow you to purchase a new car.
Take this quiz to evaluate your level of jealousy.
1. Your best friend's husband has just given her a stunning wedding ring for their 10-year anniversary. You've been married for longer, but still have the same modest ring. You:
A. Don't talk to your friend for a while. You're too embarrassed that she's got something you want.
B. Tell her how beautiful it is and joke with her to put in a few good words with your husband.
C. Whine to your husband that your friend's husband loves her more, and insist that he upgrades your ring soon so that you don't look so unloved.
2. You and your best friend go to a party and she looks hot. You:
A. Are annoyed, especially because you had agreed to go casual.
B. Yell at her for not keeping the agreement to dress casual.
C. Tell her how hot she's looking and ask her where she got the sexy skirt.
3. You heard through the grapevine that your coworker received a significantly larger raise than you did, even though you are both equal in rank. You:
A. Make a joke to your coworker about how he should do the next project solo since he's better, but then never mention it again.
B. Are happy for your coworker. He seemed to go above and beyond, and you've been less serious and less focused on your career lately.
C. Are livid and storm into your boss's office demanding a reason for the pay gap.
4. You call your guy, who is attending a bachelor party. He is having a good time. Meanwhile, you're home watching a rerun of "Batman" You:
A. Tell him that when he's ready to come home, you are waiting for him with open arms.
B. Give him a guilt-trip, but tell him you love him and to have fun.
C. Scream at him that you want him home by midnight or its over.
5. Your significant other tells you that an attractive younger woman started flirting shamelessly with him while he was having drinks with his buddies. How do you feel?
A. You are flattered that an attractive younger woman thinks your mate is as handsome and adorable as you do.
B. Like you want to cry. The thought of him enjoying attention or flirting back makes you sick to your stomach.
C. Annoyed that he didn't tell her to back off, but it probably won't even cross your mind tomorrow.
6. You heard that your best friend from high school recently got married. Meanwhile, you haven't had a date in three months. How do you feel?
A. Like a loser. If she can get married, then why can't you?
B. Happy for her. She was the one to date the most in your group--it was likely she would marry first.
C. Angry and annoyed. You'd be a better wife than she would.
7. A coworker lost 20 pounds in 8 weeks and looks great, while you've been dieting for six months and have only lost five pounds. When she asks you how your weight loss is going, you:
A. Tell her, "Not as good as yours, but at least I'm not starving myself."
B. Grimace and tell her, "OK. Slowly, but surely."
C. Say, "Not as good as yours! You look fabulous. What food plan did you use?"
8. Your parents bought your younger sibling a new car. You never received a car from your parents, not even gas money. You:
A. Are happy that your sibling has what she wants, but you'd rather work for your own possessions.
B. Call your parents screaming and crying, demanding to know why you never received anything big like that from them.
C. Are annoyed, but, your sibling was always the favorite child.
9. You recently started dating someone, and you learn that he still frequently talks to his ex over the phone. You:
A. Tell him that you admire the fact that they have remained friends after the break-up.
B. Demand that he stops talking to her if he wants this to go any further with you.
C. Ask him if he would consider breaking off contact with her, if your relationship became serious. If he says no, you have the answer you need, because you deserve to have an exclusive relationship with no baggage.
10. You are looking at yourself in a mirror at a dress you are considering buying when a woman twice your age comes out of the dressing room in the same dress and looks better in it than you do. You:
A. Look her up and down hoping she will think you disapprove.
B. Sigh, and go back in the dressing room and take the dress off--it was not a good fit for your figure.
C. Tell her the dress looks great on her and ask what her secret is to looking so young.
The green eyed monster has you by the tail if you answered the questions as follows:
1 - C; 2 - B; 3 - C; 4 - C; 5 - B; 6 - A; 7 - A; 8 - B; 9 - B; 10 - A
The green eyed monster has nothing on you if you answered the questions as follows:
1 - B; 2 - C; 3 - B; 4 - A; 5 - A; 6 - B; 7 - C; 8 - A; 9 - C; 10 - C
The green-eyed monster is only a step away from having you by the tail if you answered the questions as follows:
1 - A; 2 - A; 3 - A; 4 - B; 5 - C; 6 - C; 7 - B; 8 - C; 9 - A; 10 - B
Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, PhD, Life Coach, Hypnotherapist, Author, "101 Great Ways To Improve Your Life." Mind, Body, Spirit healing and Physical/Sexual Abuse Prevention and Recovery. As an inspirational leader, Dr. Neddermeyer empowers people to view life's challenges as an opportunity for Personal/Professional Growth and Spiritual Awakening. http://www.drdorothy.net
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